The Free Radical

I was going to call this piece “God’s Plan,” but I figured that such a title would immediately turn off the scientific-minded-skeptic crowd while simultaneously teasing the ra-ra-religious crowd. “Bob” works so much better than “God” on so many levels.

He is the Alpha and the Omega– beginning and end… departure and destination. Naturally, his name should be palindromic. Bob is the same forwards as backwards. “God,” on the other hand, becomes “dog” in reverse… which incidentally, depicts perfectly the relationship called “worship”… not to be confused with “whoreship.” Bob is in relationship only with himself.

Furthermore, Bob is already the recognized deity of the Church of the Sub-Genius. He’s established. And any controversy arising from Bob’s characterization as being a strictly male deity can first be answered by pointing out Bob’s delight for golf and smoking a pipe– a decidedly masculine combination. And the remainder of such nonsense can be put to rest with the following creation myth:

(This is my own invention– er… um… discernment, and is not derived from the doctrine of the Church of the Sub-Genius.)

In the beginning, (and right through to the end really), there was BOB. And beside BOB there was nothing. But it was a peculiar nothing. It was peculiar because BOB noticed it. I mean, how do you notice nothing? It’s nothing!

BOB perceived nothing… which is not to say that there was no perception taking place. On the contrary, it was a heroic feat of perception to actually perceive The Nothing.

And in our tale, The Nothing is represented by O.

In perceiving The Nothing, BOB penetrated the O and conceived of their amalgamation as BOOB.

And the manifest world has been sucking on that teat ever since!

And please note that the word “BOOB” is really made up of only boobs– visually. Look at it… just boobs. Decidedly feminine. And the whole thing is still palindromic to boot!

Okay, so, Bob’s Plan… This is actually serious, so please stop your tittering. This is a followup to an earlier Daily Forest Report from October 16, 2013 in which Rusty the Grasshopper came off a bit gruff and terse in his dispensation. Well, his name is Rusty, and he looks a bit like a heap of abandoned scrap metal divinely fashioned into the shape of a grasshopper; I’d expect to hear him creak when he moves! He’s not really known for being real smooth.

Now there is one conundrum Rusty leapt right over that I feel merits further elucidation. Specifically, it was his pronouncements about Intent. He identifies Intent as the thread stitching the inner and outer worlds together. It is one thread, but at one end it is wielded by the Master Weaver, BOOB, and it is BOB’s Intent. And at the other end is us trying to figure out all this crazy talk about weaving…

Now leaving the weaving, for our purposes here Intent expresses a dual nature. There is our Personal Intent– individual, internal; and then there is Universal Intent– external and well, universal… duh. Personal Intent is what you project on all levels into the universe of your experience– your hopes, desires and aspirations for the future. Universal Intent responds. But the universe is a highly conscious organism named BOOB with intentions of her own.

But that begs the question “What does the universe intend?”

Exactly!

Presumably, BOOB-the-Manifest can tug on the threads of our Personal Intent only if they connect with the general thrust of her own Intent. We can’t go against Creation.

“Say what!” you scream, and rightfully so. “All the shite that we’ve witnessed– wars, poverty, crime, etc.– is allowed to manifest…? What isn’t allowed?” I know. I know. Let’s back up a sentence. All that shite was allowed. No more.

Creation is a two-phased (faced) adventure. Phase One is Fractalization. During fractalization, creations which divide and separate, which break things down into their elemental components, which force participation at the extremes of polarity, are supported and encouraged. Only through limiting Awareness (consciousness), would Free Will ever choose to explore the extremes of polarity. It requires a certain amount of stupid to willfully explore the farthest reaches of all possibility. We’ve done that– played at being real dumb.

Now we begin Phase Two: Reintegration. Suddenly, we find ourselves having turned 180 degrees. The rules have changed– and they were not palindromic; they read very differently backwards than forwards. The universe now responds by supporting and encouraging the opposite. Creations and inventions which bring estranged pieces, people and communities together now gain unprecedented traction. We begin to assemble the ultimate cosmic puzzle.

It is good to remember that when we call together the various pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, we don’t try and take the scissors to the individual pieces to cut off the inconvenient irregularities– the bumps and the corners– to make all the pieces conform to an identical shape. If we did so, the “finished” picture would forever remain incomplete as long as the discarded bits remain unassimilated. No, our task now is to determine how all the fractals fit back together in a way which preserves, honors and truly appreciates each of their unique shapes and identities within the One.

And Bob said “Don’t call me Robert. Seriously. Don’t.”